Questions to Ask Yourself Before Trying to Find Love
So you want to be in a relationship huh? Well before you start changing your Facebook relationship status and bombard your social media with cheesy quotes and heart emojis, you should ask yourself these questions...
"Why do I want to be in a relationship?"
Is it because you're lonely, because of convenience, or is it because you're genuinely ready to commit to someone for the long term? If it's either of the first two, then these aren’t the right reasons and you're probably just jumping into a relationship for the sake of being in one and not because you've found someone you want commit your whole life to. You really have to analyse whether that's fair for all parties involved.
"Can I be alone?"
If your answer to this question is "no", then you're definitely not ready for a relationship. Committing to someone isn't just about having constant companionship, so if you're just using a relationship as a means to escape loneliness, you're not in it for the right reasons. Ask yourself why you can't stand being alone and work on becoming a more independent person. Once you can find companionship within yourself, you'll see any future relationships you have as an extension of who you are and not your entire reason for being.
"Would I date myself?"
Whether your answer is "yes" or "no", ask yourself why. What traits make you dateable and what traits don't? Ensure that your reasoning goes beyond the superficial; i.e. "I'm desireable only because of my looks". You have to dig deeper and really be introspective. By dating yourself first, you will understand your inner strengths and weaknesses. This in turn, will lead to a better understanding of who you are as a person and what you need in a relationship.
"Am I ready to be selfless and to compromise?"
Being in a relationship requires being selfless and if you're not ready to do so, then you're not ready for a relationship. If you're not the kind to compromise at all, you really need to consider whether you can find someone willing to do all the compromising in the relationship. Chances are you won't, so this means that you probably have some growing up to do.
“Do I have any excess emotional baggage?”
Are there things in your past you haven’t come to terms with? Like maybe an ex or some other debilitating insecurity? If your answer is “yes”, then you probably have to work those things out before committing to someone. As much as you think that having someone by your side will help you forget your problems, it won’t.
Long story short, getting into a relationship shouldn’t be done lightly. I know they say that you should jump into love, but if you want your relationships to last, you really need to step into it with your eyes wide open; for the sake of yourself and your future partner. Once you’ve asked yourself the questions above and you’re ready to find love, go ahead and register for Jodi!